Should dating be treated like a game of baseball and follow the same “three strikes and you’re out” rule? I ask this question because apparently there are some men out there who think they get three magical chances while dating someone. For instance, my friend, Erin, and I were emailing each other the other day and she pointed out that there are men out there who are completely clueless when it comes to our feelings. They can’t relate and they certainly don’t indicate they have any ability to have empathy for our tender feelings. This conversation came from a guy she dated, who was so self-absorbed that he was clueless to the notion that if he screwed up, it’s over. Like a lot of people, he thought that there was a learning curve in a relationship.
In the middle of our emailing, I decided to post this on my Facebook fan page:
OMG that second chances pic you posted was exactly what I was thinking.
I dated a guy once who stood me up and later said “I guess that’s strike one, right?” I said, “You haven’t earned three strikes…you’re out!”
I have no idea why guys think they get “strikes”. It implies they have 3 get out of jail free cards with no expectation of penance and we’re supposed to just tolerate it. How about get your shit together so you don’t need strikes, jackass.
I love Erin. She always has a way with words. And, just like Erin, there are no three-strikes in my world, either. If you act like a jerk, that’s it, game over.
Do not pass Go.
Do not collect $200.
Do not call the tall, red head ever again.
If you are careless with my feelings, I’m done, because if someone can be that careless with my feelings during the honeymoon period, can you imagine what it would be like after the honeymoon is over? Ya, I’m all set.
I want a man who will cherish me. Someone who is so into me that they are fearless about being rejected. Someone willing to step up to the plate and not give up. Are there any guys out there who are passionate about finding love like I am? Or is everyone so damaged from rotten relationships and horrible dating experiences that they aren’t willing to be authentic and vulnerable anymore?
Who in the world would sign up for this? Dating is not fun.
Everyone is broken…
Next…
The Redheaded Writer 
Guy response: I think it is a little selfish to believe that a guy you just met will be completely about YOUR feelings. I don’t think men OR women start dating with the intent to show all their cards and put out their deep dark secrets. The point is to get to know each other. Would this blog post be just as accurate if a woman made no attempt to understand the guy’s feelings in the first date? Self-absorbed can go both ways. If you are a woman just looking to find fault in a man, you will always find it.
I think common courtesy goes a long way. Self-absorbed people usually lack it. This is all I’m saying. There was no mention of this being a first date – only the honeymoon period, which could last months. I think you read into this the wrong way. But, I do appreciate your comment and thoughts.